Temporary Hiatus

Hi guys,
I hope you'll bear with me as I declare a temporary hiatus from posting on this blog. I have been busier than I expected to be before starting grad school and pretty tired as well. My main life goals right now are cleaning/keeping the house clean and actually getting the laundry done (along with not making frozen pizza our main food source).
I hope to be back soon with music, crafts, and thoughts on books and life and maybe social work, since I will soon be back in the thick of things. I just have to find a way to carve some time out to actually make playlists, do crafts, read, and think. So I'm working on that.
In the meantime, I still have a number of pocket notebooks up on Etsy and the big cartel store if you feel like writing anything down for yourself ;]
ta-ta for now...

Terribly Sorry Tuesday

Hello,

If there are any of you out there who watch for my playlists to come out on Mondays, I apologize for the lack of a post yesterday. I'm not sure I even know what day it is anymore.

The good news, though, is that I have a great musical bit to share with you today. One of my favorite bands of all time, The Weepies, released a new album today! If you want to read a bit of the behind the scenes, there is a nice review here. I'm so glad that Deb is healthy and that Matt and I get to go see The Weepies in concert in just a couple months! Dreams coming true. Check.

I recommended buying this album, because I love Deb and Steve and I think the music is worth it. But you also can listen on Spotify and right here:

Enjoy music from one of my favorites! Let me know if you love it too and or if you have any favorites! 

Mixtape Monday: Spring is Springing

Yesterday I saw, for the first time this spring, a tree blooming. And I am celebrating about that.

The cover picture was actually taken last year in Atlanta during the first signs of spring, but the feeling is the same. I could dance for joy about warm (not yet hot) weather, the ability to be (and stay) outside, and the trees flowering and becoming less bare. There is really not much more to say about it. I think we all understand. Especially those of us who forgot what warmer feels like.

Even though it's a rainy day today, I now have hope for spring. Join me in celebration.

Mixtape Monday: Car Troubles

Last week, I had the blessed opportunity to go to the beach for a few days with my family. The warmth and sunshine were so needed after such a long winter. It was wonderful.
Unfortunately, my return home was not as relaxing. I was welcomed home with car troubles. Matt's car had stopped starting while I was gone (thankfully he had mine to drive), and there was no indication that it ever wanted to start again. When I got home, it was time to do something about it, because we both need to drive this week.
So we went and bought jumper cables like real adults. Nothing makes you feel like an adult that has to deal with your own stuff like car troubles. My dad always helped me with all my car stuff... now he was 18 hours away (actually more because they were still driving home from Florida). The jumper cables did not work. They attached really strangely, and we did not like or trust them. We got new jumper cables. These ones we trusted. They looked legit. Nothing. We "charged" his battery with my car. Nothing. We began to think that maybe it was not the battery since this was not working. We decided we would have to have it towed the next day... we were out of options.
Our neighbor saw us struggling outside and came out to check on us. He offered to bring his jump starter box, portable super jumper thing, from work the next day (on the weekend!) ... this thing was supposed to start anything. I don't even know what it is really called, a jumper box(?), but it is supposed to start every and anything.
We woke up the next day, did some chores, started lunch and talked about when to call for the tow truck. We decided we would get the car towed after lunch.
Our neighbor knocked on our door. I hid, because I was still in my pajamas. He had gone and gotten his "super jumper" and asked us if we wanted to try it. I was thinking, Of course, but it's a long shot... nothing else has worked. Matt went out and after a couple minutes I heard his car turn on! I decided it was time to get dressed. I went outside and saw his car running. The battery was so dead it even struggled to start with the super jumper, but it did start. We thanked our neighbor profusely, and left the car running (never turning that thing off again!) while we called around to see who had the battery in stock and could help with installation (VW's are difficult). Praises for Sears who was open and could help on the weekend. They got us in and finished right away.
Matt's car works again, thanks to an expensive new battery. Don't you just love cars?

Well, because of our weekend events, I decided to make this playlist one along the theme of driving cars, owning cars, having trouble with cars, being an adult, and the kindness of our neighbor (who certainly got a "thank you" note).
Hope you enjoy it!

Mixtape Monday: Easter Week Worship

In continuation of last week's theme, and because this week is Easter week, I have decided to do another worship playlist... this time filled with some more contemporary worship. While hymns are my dearest worship love, there are some contemporary worship songs that I also think highly of. There was a point in my life where I got mad at contemporary worship, because I felt like we were always singing about ourselves and our fickle feelings instead of Jesus and his truth. With a more open mind, I think that has been a bit of a theme in more contemporary worship, but not all of it. The songs in here I like a lot, because they highlight truth: who the Savior is, honestly about our own brokenness, our need for the Lord. He saved us and we should lift Him, let him know our hearts, and turn to Him for help and everything we need.

Happy Easter week!

Mixtape Monday: Holy Week Hymns

As we prepare for Easter Sunday this week, I thought it would be fitting to make a Holy Week mixtape (because this week is Holy Week). Thinking about Holy Week brings me back to growing up in church tradition. I remember celebrating Palm Sunday (yesterday) with huge palm leaves, waving them in the air and laying them down like the people did as Jesus entered into Jerusalem. On Maundy Thursday we went back to church, this time to the small, old chapel, where we celebrated Jesus's Last Supper with his disciples, took a special communion, and listened to the solemn bells go silent. Good Friday was basically celebrated by not going to school. As a kid, I always felt like we should call it Black Friday or something more grim... Jesus died! But he died to save us and rose again. And that is good.

So, as we lead up to Easter this week, and as I am thinking about those traditions (which I personally like), I have made you guys a playlist of some of my favorite, more traditional songs. Hymns. Those of you who know me know that I love hymns. I think they are wonderful for so many different reasons - one being that I believe they sing the gospel so purely. I could go on and on. But don't worry, if you are not a hymn fan, these are mostly not straight out of the hymnal grandma style. Many artists have modernized hymns and made them a new kind of beautiful and fun. Many hymns are originally so beautiful that recreating them is just unnecessary, but I digress. Give these tunes a chance, you might just find yourself enjoying them. And because they are my favorite (and I just couldn't help myself [or choose just 10, I could make a 100 song playlist]), you get 15 songs this week!

Happy Holy Week!

Mixtape Monday: Powering Through

It has been a very long winter up here in New England. I have been done with it for a while, but it has not been done with me. Deep down, I know winter can't last forever, but I am finding it hard to believe that right now, especially after it faked us out by almost going away and then (bam!) snowing again. This playlist is dedicated to powering through. Powering through this everlasting winter, powering through that last bit of work, powering through the week, whatever it is that we need to power through.

This playlist is intentionally less depressing, because encouragement is needed to power through. Needtobreathe's Keep Your Eyes Open is my ultimate "be where you are" song. In my first year of college I was lonely and wishing for home and comfort - not recognizing or looking for the good where I was. I went to see NTB at the Georgia Theatre with my dear friend Maggie, and they played that song. As I listened to them sing it, I was convicted of not really stepping into my new "great unknown." Now I am trying to remember the same thing in another new place.

The rest of the songs are a compilation of songs that bring a bit of encouragement, from their beats and or lyrics or the way they can be related to, by artists old and new. I have some favorites from the group, but I can let you choose your own. I hope you enjoy this week's playlist and maybe find some new artists to indulge in.

Mixtape Monday: Getting to Know Me

Happy Monday! Here begins my blogging series called Mixtape Monday. I will not pretend to be unique in the naming of this series, it seems to be a popular Monday phenomenon, but I still like it. I thought this series would be the most fun, and it is the one that will be kicking off the schedule. I am still trying to figure out exactly what to do with my other ideas, so please feel free to continue to push me in any directions that seem interesting to you.

It was difficult for me to make a 10-song playlist; I like a lot of music, and I have many more songs waiting for you. I know though, that if I want to do this every week, I have to control myself. 10 feels like a nice, controlled number.

This first playlist is a bit of an introduction to me and some of the music I love. People always ask me who my favorite artist is... that is too hard of a question to answer, but if I had to pick, I can usually narrow it down to either Needtobreathe or the Weepies, depending on my mood. They are both in here.
If you know me well, you know that I enjoy depressing songs and books and movies, all the depressing works. I don't know why; maybe I am morbid, but there is something so real about struggle and pain, and I think that songs about that are so genuine. I have tried not to bring you guys down too badly this Monday, but I am warning you that you'll see some sad songs here.
I love singer/songwriter, indie/folk, and alternative-ish music. A lot of that is in here too.
Since last year, I have also gained a slight appreciation for the mainstream. There are some good artists in that group. Taylor Swift is one of them, but because she does not allow her music on Spotify (which I will be using to create playlists), you may have to jam to Ms. Swift on your own time. I do.
Great voices impress me. I love to be able to hear singers' voices; I love harmonies and duets; I love male/female duos; I love acoustic music and cool instruments, and I am a fan of listening to the lyrics.

All that being said, you will get a taste of the music and artists I love in this first playlist - some new interests and some that I have been listening to as long as they have been around. Hopefully you will enjoy them too, and hopefully you will want to come back for more.

Enjoy!

Spring Cleaning and Blog Proceeding

Hello!

(or "I wish it felt like Spring here") CLEANING

As you may have noticed upon arriving at my blog, the style is new, and fresh, and (I think) better. My hand-drawn wreath and scratchy lettering is just for my Etsy shop now ;] Thanks to a friendly fellow Etsy seller, my blog is looking clean and put together. While I know a little bit about coding... really just how to manipulate it once it is already there... I am not good at starting from scratch, so I decided to put my big girl panties on and work with someone who actually knows what's up for pretty cheap. I decided I wanted to make my blog look more professional but still feel fun and happy. I think this template met my desires. 

As you may also notice, I have added a link/page that connects to an about me page (on google plus) and another link/page that connects you to a new online store that I am trying out. This store is run by big cartel, and I really love the fresh, clean look of things. It has some of the same products as my Etsy page, so you could buy from either place, but I do enjoy the feel of the new online store from big cartel. The only thing with the new store (right now, while I'm trying it out) is that you have to pay with Paypal. Let me know what you think of the new store! Seriously, tell me!

PROCEEDING

In addition to the aforementioned changes, I wanted to develop more of a plan for this blog, what will appear on it, and when. One reason is that I want to push myself to continue to invest in the things I care about in my personal life, namely creativity (DIY, up-cycling, arts & crafts), music (appreciating what I already love and always finding new artists), and reading (anything from fiction to cookbooks to religious writings and everything in between). I don't want to make this blog random and fill it with too many things, but I also don't feel ready super-specialize the topic of my blog right now. I think going with some main categories that I want to pursue anyway will help me to keep updating the blog and keep investing my time the way I want to.

SO, I need you. Please. I would love your feedback and or ideas about my ideas. I have been trying to be clever in thinking up names of the main themes for my blog (creating, reading, and music).
- I would love to share a sort of mixtape/playlist on here once a week. Hopefully I can give some of you a nice little soundtrack for the week. These are my cheesy ideas for what to call the series: Mixtape Monday, Sunday Serenades, and Tuesday Tunes. I like the idea of the playlist coming out at the beginning of the week, though.
- For reading, I probably just would like to write up a summary, recommendation, and thoughts about my most recent reading endeavor (similar to my daring greatly post). I thought of some weekly names, but I don't know that I could truly post about a book every week. I'd like to read that much, but it may not be realistic. So, Sunday Summary, Folio Friday, or, for a monthly version, Monthly Manuscript?
- As far as creating/DIY goes, I'd love to post about some of my own projects (like the pocket notebooks) and also maybe some DIY instructions that everyone can follow; my cheesy series name ideas are as follows: Wednesday Workshop. That's it. I struggled with this one.

What do you think about my cheesy series names? Do you have better ideas? (I'm sure you do.) They don't all have to be name based on a day they would air, but I do want to try to make a more or less predictable schedule. Do you even like the ideas for what might be posted? Do you prefer some topics over others?

I'd love to keep this blog true to me, and to it's name, which leans more toward the creative and DIY side of things, but I would love any suggestions. Feel free to comment, or just tell me, what you think. In fact, please do! I have enjoyed being back on this blog so far. I'd think it was great if people enjoyed reading it too. Thank you to those who do!

Pocket Notebooks

A couple years ago, Matt (or my mom?... I feel like this was Matt's idea though) had given me a VW bus calendar, and he said it was the closest I would get to owning one of them. I have always wanted a hip, shiny old VW bus because they are so darn cute and colorful and fun. But apparently they are also known to be a wee bit dangerous because there is nothing in the front of the bus to protect you in a collision. So Matt said no... as if it was a real possibility in the first place. I never threw out the calendar though, because it really was the closest I would be to owning one.

When I started my Etsy shop, I knew that one thing people always like to buy are journals or notebooks. I had made little pocket notebooks out of that VW bus calendar of mine, and I decided wanted to share them with people. I thought they were super fun and conveniently sized, and my little connection to the hippie bus world was right in my purse with me all of the time. It seemed that other people wanted their own little VW bus in their pockets too. (There are still some VW bus notebooks left in my shop if you would like one in your pocket.)

Since these little notebooks were a small hit, I made more out of an old calendar of Matt's. This was was a travel/adventure/exploration themed calendar, and I think they turned out nicely. Now I am going to show them to you.

There they are. They are also colorful and fun, and they made me want to go hiking and climbing and mountaineering and to the beach and to the mountains and up in a hot air balloon.

All the notebooks are covered on the front and back with a continuous picture from the calendar.

Inside, these have thick white card stock pages (the pages in the bus calendars were thinner), and there are 12 pages (or 24 front and back) in each pocket notebook.

I sewed the binding on each of the notebooks with sewing thread. It is sturdy and durable, and I think sewn bindings look kinda fun. The pages were so thick that it was much harder to sew these bindings than the ones on the bus notebooks.

I think these would be great for adventure journals, hiking records, route notes, etc. ...especially the mountain ones. Of course they would also be great little pocket notebooks for making lists and jotting down reminders for anyone who enjoys a nice picture of nature. They could make a nice gift too.

Pass these on to anyone you think might like them! You can find them via the links in this post and also by clicking on my little "I sell on Etsy" button on this webpage or by going to https://www.etsy.com/shop/ExchangingAshes . I hope you enjoy viewing what I enjoy doing ;] 

Daring Greatly

A number of years ago, I found my social work someone. Her name is Brene Brown. She did a TED talk that went viral, so many of you probably have already seen it. It is called "The Power of Vulnerability." I have posted it below.

Brene ended up writing a book (her 3rd book) called Daring Greatly that went more into detail about all of the things that she talked about in this video and her other video called "Listening to Shame," and then some. The main negative comment that both the book and video get is that we all know this stuff already. Maybe we do... but have we ever confronted it? Even if we know vulnerability can be good, we still avoid it. We still stick with our shame and don't embrace worthiness. I think Brene makes us think about the way we live through her talks and her book; I think she is so passionate because she convinced herself that she could live happily without vulnerability (as many of us do), and then she found out that really was not true. She had to deal with it; we have to deal with it. Shame, vulnerability, worthiness... we have to deal with these things to live "wholeheartedly," as Brene says.

Because I believe it is important to think about these things, I am going to mention note some of my favorite points from the book:

• We live in a scarcity culture that is "steeped in comparison" - everyone is hyperaware of what we lack. This makes us shame-prone; we have trouble seeing ourselves as enough or feeling worthy of love and belonging when we are always thinking of what is lacking in our life, our world, and ourselves.
• Vulnerability is not weakness. It is daring greatly; it is courageous, and it is freeing. "Often the result of daring greatly isn't a victory march as much as it is a quiet sense of freedom mixed with a little battle fatigue."
• If we don't lean into vulnerability, recognize our shame, and feel the pain, we also won't be able to feel the joy. We often stifle joy by trying to outperform and numb our shame instead of leaning into our feeling and living in the present.
• Living wholeheartedly, and believing we are enough, leads to healthy boundaries in our lives: being able to say no and working on connection with the people who we love and who matter to us. 
• "Connectivity means sharing our stories with people who have earned the right to hear them." True vulnerability is not just a willy-nilly dumping of the most raw parts of ourselves on anyone; it is meant to be employed in trusting relationships.
• Worthiness does not have prerequisites. 
• Hope comes through struggle.

I am still working on seeing myself as worthy of love and belonging, and not shaming myself when I make mistakes. I am still learning about vulnerability and boundaries. I am trying to let go of some of my perfectionistic and people-pleasing tendencies that can steal my joy. I believe that thinking about these things, checking myself often, and knowing where I am and where I want to be are important steps in the process. I hope we can all work on embracing vulnerability and connection with each other so that we can live meaningful lives with the people we love. I think it is worth it.

I recommend all of Brene's talks and books, because even though it might not be brand new information for everyone, she writes and talks in ways that are both convicting and comforting, urging us to confront ourselves on our own journeys toward wholeheartedness.

His Eye is on the Sparrow

There is an old hymn that my grandmother used to sing. I remember her singing the last two lines of the chorus while she walked around the house:

Why should I feel discouraged, why should the shadows come,

Why should my heart be lonely, and long for heaven and home,

When Jesus is my portion? My constant friend is He:

His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me;

His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me.

Refrain

I sing because I’m happy,

I sing because I’m free,

For His eye is on the sparrow,

And I know He watches me.

“Let not your heart be troubled,” His tender word I hear,

And resting on His goodness, I lose my doubts and fears;

Though by the path He leadeth, but one step I may see;

His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me;

His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me.

Refrain

Whenever I am tempted, whenever clouds arise,

When songs give place to sighing, when hope within me dies,

I draw the closer to Him, from care He sets me free;

His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me;

His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me.

[Civilla D. Martin, 1905]

Listen to a great version here ;]

I didn't know that this biblical truth (Matthew 6:25-34 & Luke 12:6-7) that the Lord cares for me (even more than the birds) would become a recurring solace for me in anxiety, but I am glad that my Grandma started singing that truth around me early on, because I need it in my life.

Another major time I needed, and found, this truth was in college. I needed it all the years but found it on the wall when I was living in an apartment off Baxter Street with some dear friends, Hannah and Alicia. When I moved in, they had a painted window of some birds and the verse in Matthew 6 that said "Look at the birds of the air... are you not much more valuable than they?" The year I lived with Hannah and Alicia was a year of monumental growth for me in confronting my anxiety as well as my defense and coping mechanisms (here's my plug for Christian counseling/therapy - it's great). I think the Lord had placed this little painting in our apartment as another reminder to me that He was there, and I didn't have to do everything on my own.

I tried to do everything on my own for different reasons: I thought I always had to be strong, I didn't allow myself freedom to fail or just be, and I did not necessarily believe that I was worthy of the Lord's affection or attention or caring watch. And in myself I am not worthy, but I am because He makes me worthy. It is a hard truth to swallow sometimes; I am not, but I am - The I am is, so I am. Why does he love me? I don't know. But He does. He loves me when I am weak and when I fail and even when I try to go it alone. And that love is beautiful if I accept it. He's got me; when I believe this, I am so much more at peace, I can encourage others, and I am sure I shine more of His light.

In an effort to remind myself of truth that I clearly need in my life, I made a copycat of the window painting from our UGA apartment. When Matt and I moved in to our new home in CT, someone was throwing out some old windows, so I snagged a few and put this one to use for my own home. I sanded the frame, secured all the pieces, and gave the frame a new layer of white paint. After cleaning the window I painted the birds on the glass and started tracing the words of the Matthew 6 verse.

When I finished painting and it was all dry, I screwed in two picture hangers on the back and hung it on two screws in the wall. It now sits in our living room over the TV. I hope it will continue to be a gentle reminder that He takes care of the birds and he takes care of me. He sees the birds and he sees me. His eye is on the sparrow, and I know he watches me.

One Year Later...

Hello!

It has been almost a year since my first post on this blog, and I am thinking for real that I may actually try to use this as a platform of self expression (like I said I would). A lot has happened in the last year. Matt and I both graduated college, Matt found a job, we had a most spectacular summer (traveled to Europe, went on our first cruise, and mountaineered up to the top of the Grand Teton), then we moved to Connecticut, we adopted a puppy, and we found a place to live. I actually DID start an Etsy shop, and my most popular item to date has been the VW bus mini notebooks. I haven't found a job here in CT, so I spend my days cleaning, doing laundry, reading, cooking, crafting, indulging in Netflix, and hanging out with Daisy. I have been feeling quite domestic.

Now it is February, and we have experienced winter like never before. After the new year, winter really showed up. We have had snow... so much snow. Two winter storms and snow days upon snow days. Cabin fever really kicks in for me on the snow days. One good thing about the snow days is they always feel like an excuse to curl up with a good book. I am now on my 5th book of 2015!
I will take a moment to promote the books I have read this year:

• Quiet by Susan Cain (started this one in 2014 so maybe it's cheating to count it, but oh well); this book is packed full of great insight about introverts and our culture in America and how the two sometimes clash. Susan Cain makes me feel good about being an introvert.
• Yes Please by Amy Poehler; Amy is so funny. I really enjoy memoirs of all kinds, but it is especially fun when you read one from a funny famous person (I also recommend Mindy Kaling and Tina Fey's books). Amy is honest and real, and you feel like you get to know her.
• Bread & Wine by Shauna Niequist; Shauna is so relatable. Her writing had me saying, "yes, that," over and over and over again. This book is also a little bit like a memoir; Shauna writes short stories that are reflections of times in her life, but the theme behind it all is food and bringing people together to eat around the table. At the end of almost every chapter she has a recipe with wonderful instructions. Shauna makes your heart feel full and makes you feel capable of making a real meal.
• Wild by Cheryl Strayed; of course I had to read this book before I saw the movie. Check. This book makes me thankful that, as a Christian, I have hope beyond my circumstances (even though I honestly have a hard time clinging to that). This books presents themes of grief, spiraling, coping, and healing. Cheryl's healing came on a long backpacking trip on the Pacific Crest Trail, and the main thing her book made me want to do was go backpack the trail! I would love to be that cool (and I basically think I can do anything after climbing the Grand, pshh... [I wish]). 

Now I am reading Daring Greatly by Brene Brown. I am about half way through, and if I didn't already think that Brene was the greatest person who is also a social worker, I do now. Her book is like therapy, and I think therapy is a great thing. Everyone should read it.

I am hoping to read a ton of the books that have been sitting on our book shelf this year (and especially before August). I am starting graduate school at UConn in August and will hopefully be an MSW by June 2016! I am not crazy about the idea of schoolwork again, but maybe reading a bunch of books will put me more in the mood. 

Stay tuned for a post about a window painting project I recently did. I also will be adding some adventure-themed pocket notebooks to my Etsy shop soon, so please check it out and spread the word!